Happy Thoughts | Holidays

Countdown to 40

March 23, 2010

36.   It’s just a number.  Really.   I feel amazing for 4 years from 40.  And it seems life just gets better and better every year.   I love lists and frankly, it’s my blog, it’s my birthday and it’s my party!  So here’s my list of observations of last year and some pass/fail moments.   I wonder how much I’ll remember.

1. Finally don’t feel like a loser Homeschool Mom.   I think we are doing ok.   At least I know we are doing what is required, we are succeeding where we need to and I am learning to live and educate according to realistic expectations of the children I have.  Not the children my friends and associates have.

2. Letting go of my preconceived ideals of ministry and “fellowship”.  It’s scary out here in the fringes some times.   But the pay-off in family, relationships,  personal spiritual responsibility and re-learning the simplicity of faith?   Invaluable.

3.  Library Day… Love IT!!!  Quiet, wifi,  occupied children… One of the highlights of my week.

4.  I am recognizing and IMPLEMENTING the truth that the well of empathy must first be utilized for my husband and my children.   Everyone else gets what’s left over.   Ergo…  If I am spending more time talking about, praying over and problem solving your issues than you are?   I’m an idiot.

5.  Favorite quote this year, “Don’t give a $1000.00 value to a  $.50 problem.”  Word.

6.  Some people are toxic.  Even if they “say” all the right things and appear to be “trying really hard”.   A little interaction goes a long way.

7.  Every once in a while I  take a few days away from my family.   Fly off to a distant locale and live independently.   Fortunately for all of us, once every 15 years is plenty good for me and them.   😉

8.  It is better to stay silent and be thought a fool than open one’s mouth and remove all doubt.   ie…  If in doubt?  Shut up.

9.  I don’t like popcorn.   At all.   Except maybe the occasional small bowl of kettle korn.   This has been quite freeing.  Especially at the movies.

10.  I like to poke people with sharp sticks.  In a figurative sense.   Sometimes just to see how long before they respond.  Especially at the local thrift store where it looks like getting to all the stuff that’s just been put out before the pushy women who think they own the place,   Y’know, the kind of women who act all tough and bossy and butch?  They intimidate by getting in your space and most people back off.   I don’t.  I just smile, stay put and speak nicely to the employees around me and to the people I know.   I swear one of these ladies is going to have an aneurysm!  Or apoplectic shock… This shouldn’t make me giggle.   But it does.  The Mr. says I shouldn’t enjoy it too much.   Is there such a thing?

11.  The older I get the less I care about what other people are thinking and saying.   Since I started from a place of caring very little.  Or, more accurately, not thinking about it much at all….   The only difference is I am saying what I think more often.   Fortunately, what I think has been tempered quite a bit in the last several years so I’m not quite as offensive as I used to be.  Usually.

12.  This year my children are surpassing me in height.   And shoe size.  I now get the handmedown shoes from my 10 year old.

13.  Gray hair.   I have gotten a lot more gray hair this year.   Not that anyone sees it as I ferociously maintain a strict regimen of hair color and plucking.   Speaking of… Fuschia streaks coming up!

14.  Life is fragile.   And fleeting.   Make the most of your moments.   If you love someone or appreciate them or just think something they’ve done is really cool.   Tell them right now.   Don’t save up for later.   That stuff is kinda like manna.  It doesn’t keep well.

15. My migraines have gotten worse as I age.   This is no fun.   Just in case you wondered what my perspective was on this.   I am learning to recognize the symptoms and bend so that I am not crushed and broken.

16.  Today is free ice cream at Ben & Jerry’s.   They do this every year and every year I forget.   Until today.  That’s where we are going after the library.   GO DAIRY GIRL GO!!!

17.  Life lessons to middle-aged women from little girls are often under-appreciated.   The 3 year old across from me, with her flyaway blonde hair cut into a short bob that frames a face with a few bumps and scratches, has chosen to wear a brown velvet dress with a copper tulle overskirt.  This obviously is the outfit in which she feels most beautiful and it MUST be worn today.  With sneakers.    I’m taking notes.   And wearing my glorious orange/green/red swirled pashmina instead of the utilitarian fleece jacket I was tempted to wear.  You know?  The little girl is right.  I do feel more beautiful today than I would have in that coat.

18.  Blue sky days and free ice cream cones shouldn’t be wasted….

19.  I’m hanging up this post and heading out to laugh with the two greatest young men in my world.

  • All that revelation and I can’t get past the not liking popcorn thing. . . . Seriously? If I could justify, it would be ALL I ate, except I’m not a farm animal, so feeding myself dried corn is not really a good idea. . . . . .

  • Happy Birthday, Heidi! That sounded like quite a nice way to spend the day.

  • Happy Birthday, Heidi! That sounded like quite a nice way to spend the day.

  • Happy Birthday. But at 36, you are hardly close enough to 40 to get excited about it. Save your complaining for when it matters. You don’t want to use it up too soon.

  • Oh dear! Not complaining. Just startled to realize I’m that much closer to 40. I love being 36. My 30’s have been fantastic. I only see them getting better. 😉

  • Oh dear! Not complaining. Just startled to realize I’m that much closer to 40. I love being 36. My 30’s have been fantastic. I only see them getting better. 😉

  • 40 snuck up on me and hit me harder than I expected.

    Way back at the beginning of my blog I wrote about it: http://desertcat.blogspot.com/2003/07/cat-turns-40-today.html

  • AJW308

    If I am spending more time talking about, praying over and problem solving your issues than you are?

    I’ve actually told people “that I refuse to care more about your problem than you do.” after they complain because I refuse to join their pity party. That is a key to life and a major prevention of wasting thought and emotion on things outside your family.

  • momma dragon

    nice reflections…….
    glad you came to my part of the world,
    when you chose to get away this time.”)
    so happy you enjoyed your special day .
    love you more………….”)

  • Happy belated birthday! Having already arrived safely at 40, I can tell you that the view is pretty nice from here! 😉

  • Happy belated birthday! Having already arrived safely at 40, I can tell you that the view is pretty nice from here! 😉