Sublimly Ridiculous

The Opposite of Attraction

June 28, 2010

So, I guess it’s not much of a surprise that I’m writing this….  It’s happened again.

Lesbian attraction.

I am married.  SO VERY Married.   Almost 16 years married to an amazing, so very sexy and marvelous man who appreciates me, who enjoys me and who knows every awesome thing to do to make me walk around with a goofy grin.   He is my best friend, my business partner and an amazing father.

He is, for me, the perfect man.  And all that being said?

I like LOVE manliness.   The big, calloused hands.  The sweat, the earnest focus on whatever it is he is doing at the  moment.  I like how men strut when they feel good. I like the strong silent type, the loud goofy type and all the types in between.   I just like them.

I like the logical progression of thought.  A+B=Shutthehellup   I like the boyish satisfaction when they shoot things or blow things up.   Even when they are 44.   Love that I will not get the question, “Does this make me look fat?” from men.  I like it that every thing does boil down to how good it tastes, how good it looks and how good it smells.

Really.

I like how men will love me or hate me but won’t bother to figure out a confusing disaster that hovers somewhere in between.   This makes me feel safe.    I like that men are stronger than I am and that sometimes they get angry and need to physically express that.   I like it that my husband, while being much, much, much stronger than I am, can still hold my hand as gently and carefully as he does.  That his strength has never been used for anything but as a means to provide for or protect his family and his friends.   I love it that he’s so much smarter than me but never mocks me for asking the question again or not understanding the first time.

That’s my man.   And I adore him. There are elements of all this expressed in many men and I admire those qualities when I see them.    Men are cool.   Especially when I see the wild, untamed ones who don’t ask permission but take the risks,  run the race and fight the fight.

Even when they fail they are amazing to me.   I never feel more empowered as a woman as I do in the times when I have the opportunity to follow the leadership of such men.   I know then that I have the freedom to be who I was created to be.  Without the falseness of feminisim that tells me to despise myself and try my hardest to be something I’m not.

But this lesbian thing?

Dear. God….

I don’t care how flattering or schmucky they are?  I still can’t go there with them.   Butch  haircuts,  soft little hands.   Overweight,  hitting on me like a damn 12 year old.

Friends?  Sure.  I can do that.  If that’s possible.

Just. Don’t. Touch. Me.

Ever.

Blech.

Now I need a shower.

  • I agree with your sentiments. Nicely expressed!

    I don’t get out enough to worry about the hit-on-by-lesbians thing though. Or maybe I’m just not their type?

  • Fortunately, I’ve never been hit on very often by gay guys, it just grosses me out. I guess I’m not one of those super handsome guys that attracts one segment of gay men, nor a wussy little pretty boy that attracts the other type. Thank God for that. I’d probably end up punching one of them.

    And to anyone that wonders, no I wouldn’t be flattered by a gay guy being attracted to me. Double standard? You betcha!

    It seems to me though that most women, even the absolutely would never even try the other team type of women are at least flattered when a pretty lesbian is attracted to them. I’m not referring to overtly sexual come-ons, I’m just talking about light flirtation. I suppose it’s not much different than women liking, even craving the approval of other women in other ways.

    Guys don’t seek approval from other guys in regards to our looks, our clothes, our shoes etc. so being complimented by or hit on by a gay guy just seems so unnatural and unmasculine.

  • I guess I’m fortunate. Never have been the type to crave approval from women. Of course, I tend to be put off by anyone being overtly friendly, let alone flirting. Here’s a giant bubble, stay out of it please, thanks!

  • But you’re so stinkin’ hot that Who could Resist trying? Good Gravy. Give these girls a break. Ya can’t blame them for trying. 🙂

  • AJW308

    PebbleKeeper, I read your comment, was baffled, read your handle, then laughed with understanding.

  • I don’t usually wonder if other women approve. I assume they don’t. 😉 As for “flirtation”. I’m not talking about the occasional glance or giggle.

    It’s the confession of a “fantasy” that includes me… Um… No thanks?

    It’s the comment, when referring to me wanting to lose some weight, “There’s nothing wrong with you, just more cushion for the pushin’.”

    These were women I had tried to be friends with, really had thought we were friends.

    Then this…

    That’s the blech. The eewww factor. The need for a shower.

    And the loss of friendship. Which just pisses me off. It’s not like it’s easy for me to make friends anyway. Aquaintances? I have a million. Friends? Not so many.

    And PK? I’m confused by your comment. Sarcasm I get. But “the girl that’s trying”… knew me better.

  • Ewww.

  • For the record, my reaction to being “hunted” by men is pretty much the same as being “hunted” by girls. If I’m out and about and I get a flirtatious look or a nice remark, whatever…

    From people who know me? Who know my husband and interact with us socially and as “friends”.

    Just nasty.

    It doesn’t happen a lot and I’m not trying to be All That about this. It offends and affects me greatly when it happens. Whether boy or girl. Btw, I have a couple acquaintances that I have kept even though these women are batting for the other team. So, apparently, I’m not their type.

    Which is just fine with me! 🙂

    I would really like to be able to have said that I had maintained some wonderful friendships instead of finding myself unable to maintain a relationship with people I had grown to care about.

  • Doom

    I had no idea any woman thought what you thought. I am glad to be out of the city. Maybe there are more women who haven’t been infected by feminism out here. I’m almost embarrassed (that you know us so well and still like us? maybe). I am also pleased to hear you have such a man… and vice versa! Jealous too, but happily and kindly.